Role Models

Who is your role model?  And why do you look up to this person?

Is it because they are organized and you aspire to be organized?

Do they have a lot of money, a good career, an awesome education....a beautiful family?

Do they have an amazing talent?

Webster.Com defines a role model as this:

a person whose behavior in a particular role is imitated by others.

IMITATED by others.  Who do you "imitate"?  Usually what you imitate is based on who or what influences you.  This is tricky. Some people spend most of their adult lives battling what influenced their childhood.  You have to be careful when deciding if the role model(s) you look up to are healthy-for-you influences or not-so-spiritually-healthy-for-you influences.

I have been thinking a lot about what not only influences me, but how I influence others.

In Titus 2, the Bible states:

Similarly, teach the older women to live in a way that honors God. They must not slander others or be heavy drinkers.  Instead, they should teach others what is good. These older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children, to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes, to do good, and to be submissive to their husbands. Then they will not bring shame on the word of God.

I hope that when people think of me-they see a woman of God that they can look up to (not perfect, but someone who works hard at doing her personal best and loves God no matter what).   I aspire to share my love for God with others and show how He has changed my life.  I continually seek and pray for relationships in my life that glorify God.  I pray for friendships with Godly women I can look up to.  

After all, even "role models" need role models-"Godly models."  I choose that healthy-for-you type influence for my life.

Some days, I feel I have to "battle" Satan-he loves to poke around with my emotions.  At these times, I refuse to let him make me feel less than I am!  I look to God for direction-pour myself into scripture, pray for continual forgiveness, seek opportunities for spiritual growth, and do the very best that I can for HIM.  

My prayer for my readers today is that you seek God AND a Godly role model in your life...not necessarily an idol (there is a difference)-and that you continually work on being the role model others can look to.  Even when its hard.

May you always be filled with the fruit of your salvation-the righteous character produced in your life by Jesus Christ-for this will bring much glory and praise to God.

Philippians 1:9  

  

Confirmation

Hey dear friends!  My last post was all about stepping out in FAITH.  And I am just sitting here reflecting-with a smile on my face-at how the last month God has shown me that by trusting in HIS plan, everything will work out even better than I could have imagined for myself.  
In my post I mentioned that I could not confirm what decisions I was trying to make-but now I can tell you...although you may have guessed...

I got a new job!  

Not just ANY job.  A job that provides more for my family, a job in which I feel appreciated and WANTED, a job that I am excited about!
And I will admit I was worried about the transition.  This isn't an easy time for switching jobs.
I stayed in scripture, poured myself into His word, and prayed deeply.

Some things that happened within this transition that confirmed God's plan for me:
1. Interview went REALLY well.  I prayed that God would help me not to stumble!
2. Offered job right away.  No waiting, worrying.  
3. A co-worker I had put on my resume actually had worked for this administrator (surprise)!
4. Administrator is a woman of God, who has children (and a love for children)!

These aren't the only indicators of God's loving hands spread over me, there were a lot more things that happened in this process that had me thinking "ONLY GOD COULD DO THIS!"  I am so thankful!  What a breath of fresh air! 

For the Lord your God is living among you.

He is a mighty savior.

He will take delight in you with gladness.

With His love, He will calm all your fears.

He will rejoice over you with joyful songs.

Zephaniah 3:17

Fly Away

A couple of weeks ago, in the morning, I was walking from my car to my classroom and in the middle of the sidewalk sat a little bird.   I looked straight at him and he looked completely helpless; he looked like he had been hurt and did not fly away when I came near him.  I think maybe he had flown into the window and landed right on the concrete.

Now, I love animals and all of God's creations but I don't consider myself to be an "animal rescuer."  What I mean is I don't really get upset if someone squashes a bug...and although I do wish to see every animal in those animal shelters homed-I am not normally the advocate that puts them there.  However, there are people who have the love and skill who know what to do in a time of "animal crisis"-like my co-worker Katie-who is an avid animal lover and rescuer.  As soon as I got into the building I let Katie know about that poor little bird.  She started a rescue mission right away-letting other teachers know the bird was there (making sure kids didn't mistake him for a leaf, making sure no one accidentally stepped on him).  In about 10 minutes she had located some butterfly contraption to put him in, called someone who knows of a wildlife rescue that might take him and nurse him back to health, and located gloves (as not to get her scent on the bird when transferring him to said butterfly contraption).  I love this about her!  After all this prep to get the bird, she walks outside and can't find him!  I walk back outside with her and help her look for him and we realized he must have flown away.  I was happy for that little bird because I know the quality of life for him would have declined had we tried to transfer him to some strange place-out of his habitat.

Recently I was given the opportunity to fly away from my own "habitat" and to do this I had to step out in Faith.  I knew there would be an opportunity coming-I just wasn't sure when.  I have had this feeling for about 6 months-I just felt something (someone, the Holy Spirit) tell my soul: "Don't worry.  This isn't it.  There is more." 

In the last two weeks, I have been prayerfully considering this opportunity that literally fell at my feet.  I continually sought out God's Will in this situation and everything just kind of fell into place.  It still is! And although I cannot confirm EXACTLY what that is yet...I do know that God gave me the courage to step out in Faith, to trust Him, to step out of my Comfort Zone...and that's not easy for anyone!

I think, just like that little bird, at the point of rescue-God gives us the courage to "fly away"-either from what's holding us back or with peace to stay where we are.  Or maybe its the courage to experience something new!

I have been reading the book "Unglued" by Lysa TerKeurst.  In the book Lysa says: "Remember, Comfort Zones don't have to be comfortable, they're just familiar."  That is SO true!  And I KNOW because I am following what God wants me to do; stepping out of my comfort zone and flying away from my "familiar habitat"!  And I know he will give me the strength to soar!   How do I know its what God wants me to do?  I feel peace in each decision- in a moment where normally my anxiety and worry would be at an ultimate high!

How exhilarating...peace in my soul...new opportunities...for the good...for me...who loves God!  I can't wait to spread my wings and see where this new opportunity takes me!  

And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.

Romans 8:28

But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength.

    They will soar high on wings like eagles.

They will run and not grow weary.

    They will walk and not faint.

Isaiah 4:31

Love a Veteran

I have been fortunate enough to live, serve, and work in a military community.  I teach students whose fathers or mothers serve locally and overseas (on deployment).  I've witnessed first hand the toll a deployment can take on a family-on the kids, the spouse, and the deployed serviceman.  

In fact, my husband used to be in the military.  When my husband and I were engaged in 2004, he was deployed to Iraq for about 5 months.  Of course, 5 months to me seemed like an eternity and I struggled often times wondering about his safety and missing him terribly.  I think about the students I teach, whose parents go away for years at a time. Being a parent myself now I can feel how hard it must be for these kids and their families.  My heart sincerely aches for them.  Not only are their parents deployed for months, sometimes years at a time...but they are also moved from place to place periodically.  I have also seen the devastating effects of war-I have been close to families who have lost loved ones in the war and ones who have lost limbs.  Some military servicemen who are no longer serving still fight their own war in some way-whether mental or physical-effects that they cannot control.

Veteran's Day is Monday and I've been thinking a lot about our military.  My church is doing a Bible Study in small groups and a sermon series on Rick Warren's "40 Days in the Word."  In our small group, we had a "Micah 6:8" assignment to get involved in the community.  Our small group chose to go to the local Veteran's Hospital and visit the Veteran's during the holidays, bringing a small gift of socks to keep their feet warm.  We were told that some of the Veterans in this hospital don't have family that live close by and that some have no one to come visit them.  This really saddened me.  For a few reasons.
1. Because, the reason I was able to vote last week was because of a Veteran who fought to save that right (and many more) for me. 
2. I can go to church, write this blog, and work a job because of the Veterans and our current military that have served in war zones, risking their lives to protect my rights for these freedoms.  Some of them have lost their lives.
3.  I feel there are a lot of  "thank yous" to our military and veterans but no actions.  

Why do we have Veterans sitting in a hospital with no visitors?  No one to pray over them, talk to them, show them they care, or show their appreciation?  

I am not one to get on my soapbox about elections and so forth and I'm sure you've heard enough but...does it bother anyone else that our candidates for presidency did not serve in the military whatsoever?  I would like to think that someone who is "the head" or "the boss" of the military (if you will) of the United States of America...a country founded on freedom and has waged many wars...should know what it is like to be on the battlegrounds.  Not just know somebody who is.  That's just my thought.

But back to the Veterans...I just want to say that I hope on Veteran's day that you will join me in praying for our current military and for the Veterans.  Pray for our elected officials.  Pray hard for those who are currently deployed.  Make sure that you thank a Veteran...visit a Veteran...love a Veteran...but not just Monday because its Veteran's Day...but anytime you meet one or see one.  Say "thank you" to our veterans through your actions (visit a VA hospital or support the VFW).  Because their sacrifices over the span of America's history are part of the reason we have the freedom to live, laugh, and love.  

We are so lucky to have a loving God, who knew us before we were formed in our mother's womb-who created people who were strong enough to fight, serve, protect, and sacrifice for others.  When I think of serving others, I think of Veterans and I realize-what an ultimate sacrifice to risk your own life...

I also think of Jesus, who not only risked his life, but who died to save us from our sins.  

Our military have fought and are still fighting to create peace and save the rights for us to choose how we live our life.  

Are we living our lives in appreciation for those that make it possible?  Do our actions speak louder than our words? 

No, the LORD has told us what is good. What he requires of us is this: to do what is just, to show constant love, and to live in humble fellowship with our God. 

Micah 6:8

I hear voices...

I hear voices...and no I'm not crazy (I think)!

I really mean it-I hear voices.  And these voices are coming to me most of the time when I make a decision to SIN.  Yes, I said it.  A DECISION to sin.

It goes like this:
Person: "Blah, Blah, Blah...gossip, gossip, gossip."
Me: "Blah, Blah-*insert voice in my head saying 'you know better' & quick decision to continue*.....gossip, gossip, gossip"

And folks, it just isn't when I'm tempted to gossip.
This voice comes to me:
1. When I wake up ("Oh, good morning, checking facebook before your devotional?")
2. On my way to work ("Oh, you have a lot to do? Too much on your mind?  Hard day ahead?  Turn down your music and pray.")
4. When I'm listening to others complain ("Tell them it could be worse.  Give them a different point of view").

You know where I'm getting at.  This ain't your ordinary angel/devil on the shoulder talking. It's the Holy Spirit.  And here lately I've noticed that when I'm tempted... He's right there giving ME advice and guiding ME through my day.

Everyday I'm faced with decisions.  From the time I wake up (what's for breakfast?) until the time I come home from work (what's for dinner? what do I need to clean, do, etc.?).  I decide what comes out of my mouth (is it kind? necessary?).  I decide my actions.  I also decide how I'm going to react to what I hear.   

I ultimately decide if I am going to let sin control me or if I am going to let Jesus guide me.

The decisions I make are not always the right ones.  Sometimes my actions are influenced by the good decision I make when I hear that voice.  What does that mean? Why???

I truly feel the more in the Word you are (aka: reading your bible, having more quiet time with God, etc.) that you will feel His presence more deeply.  The more you know and ponder on what you've learned from scripture can lead you to make (good, better, the best) decisions that before you felt had no choice.  You go from the mentality of "Oh, I'm just a 'talker'-I've always been.  I can't help it when I gossip"...to... "Is what I am about to say helpful? Is it necessary?  Is it kind?"

Do you hear voices?  

I know what is GOOD.  I know what is BAD.  I also know what is GODLY.  

What decisions are you making that impact your relationship with God? 

In this month of THANKSGIVING, I'm going to admit that I'm thankful for the voices in my head.  They make me see the straight path ahead.  Because without God's guidance, I'm clearly lost.  

I want you to prayerfully consider your week(end) ahead.  What choices will you face?  Will you CHOOSE God's way or another way?  Because, friends, in the end, there is only ONE way.  Amen?  Amen!

Patient endurance is what you need now, so that you will continue to do God’s will. Then you will receive all that he has promised.

Hebrews 10:36   

Be careful that you do not refuse to listen to the One who is speaking. For if the people of Israel did not escape when they refused to listen to Moses, the earthly messenger, we will certainly not escape if we reject the One who speaks to us from heaven!

Hebrews 12:25

Forgiveness

I know...it's been awhile.  Rather than a catchy title, which is how I usually title my posts to peak interest, I decided that I would just title this post on the meat of the subject...FORGIVENESS.  

I used to hear this word and say "oh yeah I forgive."  But even now, when I still see that person that I've had issues with in the past-and I am consciously and verbally still hatin'-that's not really true forgiveness.  There is a difference between removing it (the person, situation) from your life and forgetting and actual forgiveness and letting it go.

My first question to you is: What are you holding on to?

Right now I'm holding on to a few things in my life. Some of them deal with ongoing issues that stemmed from when I was younger...some are fresh and work-related and I'm trying really hard to find that forgiveness in my heart.  I'm struggling right now.  Mostly because my feelings were hurt in this situation and it's hard; I try so hard to live the life that God intended for me to live.

Tonight when I was at church we were singing "Hosanna"-the lyrics go like this:

"Take my heart and make it clean.
Open up my eyes to the things unseen.
Show me how to love like YOU have loved me.
Break my heart for what breaks yours.
Everything I am for your Kingdom's cause
As I walk from Earth into eternity."

My waterworks started coming down and I couldn't control them.  I scrambled to find a napkin or tissue because I didn't want anyone to see me crying. I guess I didn't want anyone to ask me if I was OK.  I was able to dry it up to cover my guilt...and I realized at that moment that God had laid it on my heart that I needed to start being more forgiving.  

True Forgiveness.  How can I explain to you what it means for God to truly forgive?  I can explain it only in the best way I know how: its like when your husband (or your wife, or your parent, or your child) does or says something really dumb or possibly hurtful and you are able to still love him (or her) anyway and let it go.  And forget it.  

God truly forgives me.  Sincerely.  He loves me anyway and He lets it go...  

Sometimes, for me, the "letting go" part is hard.

Ever held a grudge?  It's easy to forget about the pain people have put you through if you never see them...but its very painful when you do and you truly haven't made peace with them in your heart.

My second question to you is: What are you (and I) going to do about it?

Whomever hurt me in the past, whatever process I am going through to forgive them means "letting go."  You can't hold a grudge and let go at the same time.  It's easy to say forgive.  I realize I am still working on the process of forgiving...but I also KNOW God has no trouble forgiving when I come to him.  As I strive to be more Christ-like, I am learning that forgiveness means leaving it to God (to ultimately deal with that person or situation), loving to matter what (even if it hurts and is hard to do-because it is), leaning on God to guide you through the process, and then letting go.  Be free.  

I don't know where you are in the forgiveness process in your life.  But, I know that God's forgiveness has changed my life completely.  I can't let God forgive me and then turn my back on forgiving others.  

So this is what I'm working on: FORGIVENESS.  Anybody with me?

Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior.  Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.

Ephesians 4:31-32

 

A Child's Thoughts

A couple of weeks ago I went to pick my son up from preschool and as soon as I walked in the door he said "Mommy, I'm sorry."  I said "What happened?"  He said, "I got a red apple because I was playing on the carpet."  
Red apples are NOT good apples to have (although I'm sure you're initial thought when you read this is that red apples are good and pretty tasty).  The behavioral system set in place at his preschool is as follows: green apple (good), yellow apple (warning), red apple (not good).  When my son gets a red apple he gets a spanking (yes we discipline) and no TV.  This is devastating at our house.  
No one likes to discipline their child, (especially if they haven't seen them all day)...and I felt bad for him because he knew what was coming when we got home.  He has gotten a few red apples in his lifetime...(gasp, a son of 2 teachers, no less)...but, this time was different.
This particular day, his afternoon teacher came up to me to tell me that the morning teacher (who put him on red) doesn't want him to have a spanking.  My initial thought was (what a relief) but then I worried about the consistency of our behavior rules.  I know he didn't just get a red apple for playing on the carpet...I am sure by the time he had to switch his apple to red he probably had 10 warnings and the teacher had had enough.  But, why would she say not to discipline at home?  I thought it was weird because she'd never asked us that before.  So, we told our son the teacher told us not to spank him.  He was relieved but didn't ask why and we weren't sure if we did the right thing as far as being consistent goes.  Oh, parenting is so hard!
The very next day my husband came home and told me when he saw the morning teacher (the hubs drops him off at preschool and talks to her in the morning) and that she had said: "Your son asked me after he turned his red apple if Jesus was going to be mad at him."  
WOW.  So that is why she didn't want us to spank him.
You see this is a phenomenal step in our family.  #1, my husband told me.  #2, he didn't have an issue with it.  #3, I didn't get reprimanded for teaching this to him.  
I have said before in my previous posts that my husband is very supportive of my relationship with God.  But, he is not supportive of anything that has to do with God being "taught" to our son (by me).  My husband is OK with prayer (he won't bow his head but me and my son do) when we eat.  He is OK with me taking my son to church or my mom taking my son and having other people teach him about God.  But, he does not want me to.  I know it's weird, but true.  It leaves me in a predicament...how can I not teach him the TRUTH?  My husband and I have had many talks about what we want for our son.  My husband believes if one of us "pours out" our beliefs on him that it will be like "brainwashing," which in turn may hinder his decision making process because he is so young.  My husband and I have agreed that we want our son to be able to choose. But if I don't give him choices (like learning about God), how is he going to be able to choose? 
In the very beginning of my spiritual journey it was very hard for me to convince my husband to let my son go to church...or even buy him a Bible (that was a huge argument between us).  But eventually, he has seen how much our son loves to go to church and he actually let me buy him a Bible (but he won't read it to our son).  So, we've come a long way.  And the fact that my son felt convicted...not to his parents...but to God.  I wonder if that was eye-opening for my husband?  Or eye-rollling?
But back to what my son said..."Will Jesus be mad at me?"  I have only had brief discussions with my son about God and sinning.  And he didn't call it sinning.  But he wanted to please God.  Not just his parents, not just his teachers, not himself, but God.    
I think to myself...he is a child with so much conviction...where's mine at?  When I am in "trouble" or do things I know I am not supposed to do, do I wonder if "Jesus will be mad at me?"  Do I think about how my actions reflect my relationship with God?  

For example:
Am I quick to listen to the latest gossip in the lunch room?  Even if I don't spread it, I am just as guilty as listening to it.  Learned my lesson the hard way about that one. 
*Rumors are dainty morsels that sink deep into one’s heart. Proverbs 18:8.

Do I watch movies and TV shows...or read books that are not pleasing to our Father?  The ways of the world are hard to break.
*Don’t you realize that friendship with the world makes you an enemy of God? I say it again: If you want to be a friend of the world, you make yourself an enemy of God. James 4:4

Am I quick to anger or jump to conclusions or have a short temper too often?  Do I blame it on lack of sleep and stress? Absolutely.
*Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires.  James 1:19-20

Do I do things I know I am not supposed to do?  
And if I do things I know I am not supposed to do...do I at least think: WWJD?  (And you know what that means).

My child's thoughts have got me thinking about my life...my ways...my sins...my repentance.  
I would like to ask a favor...that you please say a prayer for me; to be a parent that God wants me to be, to do everything in my power to bring up my child in the way God wants me to.  

I have learned something through this "red apple experience"-that even when I don't think my 4 year old listens or understands what I am saying...God knows my intentions and can speak to my child in ways I will never be able to comprehend.  I have also learned that whatever I say and whatever I do...my son is watching...so I need to make sure I do it right the first time...for him and for God.  

If you have children of your own, my prayer is that you strive to be the parent(s) God wants you to be.  And if you don't, strive to be the person God wants you to be.  Be convicted.

Remember, it is sin to know what you ought to do and then not do it.  

James 4:17